Thursday, November 11, 2010

Palindrome Then and Now

I've been thinking recently about what I thought marriage would be like.  My dreams.  My reality.  My expectations from high school are deeply contrasted by my current expectations.

My relationship thoughts have largely been shaped by my faith.  When I was in Jr. High, I was counting down the days until I turned 16.  My parents had promised that I could date at that age and I figured I'd have a high school sweet heart, go to college, marry that sweet heart, and have babies - just like my parents.  Awwwwwww.

Around the time I turned 16, our church got swept up  into the "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" movement.  It may sound crazy to some, but the main idea was a throwback to formal courting where the gents initiated, parents chaperoned, etc.  Needless to say, I was never asked out in high school.
The summer I was 16, our youth group visited an orphanage in Mexico.

I thought that college would be my ticket to my MRS.  I had (actually still have) strong desires to be a mother.  I think I'm just hardwired this way.  So I made a plan.  I'd meet a nice boy at Bible study my freshman year.  Sophomore year, we'd hang out more, become best friends.  Junior year, we'd become more than friends.  Senior year, we'd be engaged and I'd plan a wedding for the weekend after graduation.  Ha!
At Palindromaid S's (and Mr. Palindrome's!) graduation with my MRS plan gone to crapola.

Now, I see that love doesn't follow my plans.  I realize that my high school and college dreams didn't reflect what I truly wanted.  The thing I wanted most was to meet a man who would challenge me, be my companion, love me, and love building a family with me.  The path and timing wasn't the most important thing, but I focused a lot on that in my love immaturity.

Our love story started in college but unfolded over the next 5 years.  We moved a combined total of 11 times during that time, sometimes in opposite directions.  It wasn't my ideal path, but it was my dream.
Mr. Palindrome and me circa 2006

How have your thoughts about relationships matured since high school?

3 comments:

BigAppleNosh said...

Oh how our plans change! Loved reading this about you and all the accompanying pictures!

LatteLove said...

Isn't it funny how things like this work out?

My church was also into the IKDG movement and I didn't go on a date until a few weeks before my 18th birthday (and I didn't tell my parents!)

My plan was a little different from yours--I wasn't planning to meet anyone in college, or get married until I was in my late twenties. I met E at age 19 and we were married two years later.
I also never imagined I'd move out of my hometown area--and I'm about as far as I can be (in the US)

Christine said...

What a great post...my story is quite similar to yours. My college MRS plan failed as well, but it seems we managed to find them along the way. :)